The Strong Silent Type – Why Men Should Be Seen and Not Heard

strong and silent tyoe

Right off the bat, let me say, I am NOT a hater of men. I’ve had too much exposure to Sad Spinsters to understand that no matter how much one has been burnt, turning your back on the opposite sex gets you nowhere (except maybe to the land of the Sex Droughts). And regardless, we need men to make babies and do some basic heavy-lifting.

Y’all already know I have a thing for old-school Alpha males but I’m beginning to think that the few that are left in the world are all too busy running around on a rugby field with blood streaming down their faces to be available for a date. Most ‘men’ I encounter on my day-to-day interaction with the Tinderverse and beyond, are far removed for the strong silent type of yesteryear.

The modern ‘man’ it seems likes to talk about his feelings, whether us ladies want to hear about it or not. And, no I’m not saying we’re any better, but nobody really denies that women can be naggy. But can you blame us these days when we are constantly having to listen to all our ever-so-sensitive boys complaining about how they just broke a freshly-manicured fingernail whilst trying on their fabulous new reindeer jumper.

Like I was saying, blokes these days like to talk and it’s no longer just about sport. Nowadays they feel the need to offer their not-so-humble opinions on everything from the quality of a girl’s OKC profile to her eating habits. Talking is not in itself a bad thing, (none of us really want to date Mr Monosyllabic either) and as they say ‘it’s good to talk’ but I do wish some dudes would think before opening their big phat mouths.

If you have nothing nice to say….

Remember back when you were a kid and you visited that boring aunty who really couldn’t cook. You weren’t allowed to complain though, so you just shut up, swallowed the ‘food’ and twiddled your thumbs. The reason you didn’t let the inner restaurant critic speak out was because you knew your mean words wouldn’t serve a purpose other than to probably send that 50-year old virgin over the edge. Sadly, it seems that some of our mama’s boys were never taught this basic lesson in decency. Telling a girl that her nose is skew or that she is of below average intelligence isn’t going to win you any fans.

Silence is Golden

I don’t agree with ghosting. Vanishing out of a person’s life is just not nice (they might be concerned that you’ve gone on a Dewani Township Tour of SA). But sometimes, sending a OKC girl you’ve only WhatsApp’d a handful of times a short essay saying she’s a prude and you are looking for ‘a physical connection’ before anything else is just pathetic. Best you just visit Mavericks and get some much needed matter for the wank bank. Oh and just remember Cape Town’s a small place…that essay you sent, it’s probably gone viral by now.

There are bigger problems in the world….

Man-flu – awwww poor baby. Ugh, while women deal with their monthly cycle, the pain associated with intimate hair removal and child birth, there you are crying about the frigging common cold! Boys, we DO NOT care. Suck it up! It’s so annoying having to hear men these days moaning about such minor ailments, while others are busy battling cancer and trying to save the world. Purleaase, if these guys want someone to kiss their forehead and wipe their snotty nose why don’t they call up their mama. And those of them that claim that they have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder because their parents never bought them that bike they wanted when they were 3. Pah, go seek some professional help…elsewhere!

Bring back the STRONG SILENT type!!

Now Rinsers, have your say. Are the boys of today just a bunch of whingers? Do you think the ‘men’ of today should been seen and not heard? And dudes, you have been given permission to speak (but only in the comments below)…


  1. Haha! You seem to be hanging around some truly interesting guys! I get the sentiment, though. I often wish I could meet a nice, strong, handsome guy that would “out-guy” me! I am usually the one assuming more of the male role in the relationship.

    I totally agree with you about the douche essay you received that probably has gone viral! I guess that is more traditionally “male” but totally uncalled for! It was meant to make you feel insecure about your OKCupid profile (and even maybe yourself) because obviously the guy has major issues with himself!

    One too-much-information share you didn’t mention was when guys go on and on and on and on about how they are emotionally fucked up by some ex! WTF! Especially considering these guys are usually hoping to bed you?? It also gives all their power away to someone else. Feel pain, deal with it, move on, try to figure out how to do it better next time! Or guys who offer way too many personal intimate stories when you first meet them! Hmm, maybe it is a boundary or lack there of??


  2. Haha! This is so true! I’ve often said that we women always say we want a sensitive man until we actually get one and realize he’s more feminine than we are. I had an ex who constantly bitched about something unimportant, then he would bitch even more when I told him he was bitching!

    This guy I’m dating now told me his whole life story on our first date. I mean sure, I want to get to know you, but that’s a little too much information. Are you trying to run a girl off? He had a few beers so I thought maybe he’s just talkative when he’s drunk, but then a few weeks later, he told me he was a VERY honest man. This could potentially be a problem if I ever ask him, “Does this dress make me look fat?” or “Do you like my hair?”

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sensitive…I think when we were asking for sensitivity, we were asking them to be more aware of our feelings…we didn’t expect them to become total sissy’s.

      Nobody wants to hear a sob story on a first date. Even if you have a terribly sad story I think you need to tell it such a way that it doesn’t come across all ‘poor me…my life is sooo hard…my mama never loved me’. Sharing is good, but win her over first!

      Honesty is great. But as I said, there is always a time and a place.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Everyone has feelings…it’s just that we don’t want to hear about such trivial matters the whole time. We know guys have problems and they get sad…but we are DONE with excuses about how hard their childhood was, etc. Just want them to man up and get on with things.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I agree but to a point …the silent strong types have their down side too, being they don’t express themselves well and they keep things bottled in unlike the overly talkitive overly sensitive guy that tells everything

        Liked by 1 person

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