The ‘Katie Girl’ – Embracing Your Quirks over Being Tamed

“The world is made up of two girls, the simple girls and the Katie girls. I’m a Katie girl!”

~Carrie Bradshaw, Sex and the City 

The term ‘Katie Girl’ is a rather obscure reference to a character in 1970’s movie The Way We Were staring Robert Redford and Barbara Streisand. For those of you who haven’t seen the movie (like me) – a ‘Katie Girl’ can be described as a somewhat quirky woman, who men tend to love and have passionate/roller coaster relationships with but eventually ditch for a more ‘normal’/manageable woman (aka Simple Girl).

If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of such a situation(i.e a ‘Katy Girl’) it’s pretty horrible. One minute you are dating a guy, the chemistry is electrifying, the banter is great and the sex is mind-blowing, then the next thing BOOM he replaces you with a (usually) pretty but insipid sort of girl. It’s almost as you were his guilty pleasure for a short period of time but ultimately he realised that as much fun as things, you were just a little too rough around the edges and he needed to find himself a girl he could take home to meet the parents.

In a relationship things might be a little different. The good days are brilliant and he won’t be able to get enough of you, but on the bad days you’ll be a loggerheads and a visit to hell might even seem like an enticing prospect. Because he does love the ‘Katie Girl’ he’ll stick around a little longer and try to tame her and her crazy ways. But at some point this battle becomes too tough for the ‘big man’ to handle so when a pretty little cookie-cutter girl comes along, he decides to cut his losses, say goodbye to the butterflies and settle for someone who’ll essentially toe the line.

I’m sure that this is something that many of us have experienced ourselves or been witness to. Following such an event it’s natural for a ‘Katy Girl’ to be a bit introspective and wonder why something so good had to end and also why the guy felt the need to downgrade to such a polar opposite kinda chick. If it happens often enough ‘Katy Girls’ eventually start to believe that they are the problem and some may even contemplate ‘selling out’, piping down and essentially becoming the kind of Simple Girl that he’ll get down on one knee for.

I think the thing to remember here is that the ‘Katy Girl’ is not the problem, it’s him. Sure, a strong, independent woman with a mind of her own can be hard to deal with it at time and it’s understandable that a man who wants a quiet life will settle for the Simple Girl. But at the end of the day, the problem is with him. The fact that he is willing to take the easy way out and settle for someone that meets the standards set by mainstream society shows lack of characters. The truth is (and I’m speaking from experience here) that even though he’ll settle for the Simple Girl, it’ll be difficult for him to shake off the effect that ‘Katy Girl’ had on his life. And chances are when you least expect it, he’ll probably rock up at your work place and declare his undying love for you.

I’m not going to sit here and dish out any advice to all of the ‘Katy Girls’ out there (because they are unlikely to be the type that will listen anyway). So I’ll just end by saying that the mission shouldn’t really be about compromising on your quirks in order to have the average man settle down with/for you, but instead it should be about embracing the things that make you stand out from the crowd. At the end of the day Mr Right won’t need to tame you as he’ll be man enough to tolerate your craziness because he’s just as much of an oddball as you are.

OK Rinsers. It’s time for you to have your say. What are your thoughts on ‘Katy Girls’? Do you think girls who are failing at dating should possible tone down their personalities so that guys find them easier to handle? Do you think some men find the more feisty, independent ‘Katy Girl’ a threat to their traditional ideas of manhood?